And the little Birdie said “tweet TWEET tweet” and Molly laughed. The- hell? Where- Elise? Elise?! Get out from the closet and lay back down, I'm only reading you a story. I’m only a Princeton PhD reading you a bedtime story, no need to pay attention. And I know it's not Proust but my interpretation can't be that bad. Granted many people wouldn't have put the emphasis on the second "tweet" and simply read them all with the same inflection. But wasn't it Auden who said the lazy ear is shocked by- a bucket? Is this some sort of metaphorical protest? This bucket on your head? It not my fault if the pacing of the book is trash. I would never have included all the exposition with the fairy princess who never effects the plot. So if you get bored before we get to the part with the dragon, don’t take it out on me. So you can get rid of the bucket. Anytime. Listen, Elise, I’m not doing this just because I like to hear myself talk. There are other reasons. Foremost among them is I owe your mother for talking me out of a tattoo, but I don’t have to do- airplane noises? You’re just going to wash me away in some kind of sonic drone? Elise? Please. Elise? ELISE! Thank- on no, don’t cry. Don’t cry. Hey, heyyyyy, I think it’s great you hold strong opinions about literature, but as you grow into a strong, independent woman you need to remember to respect your elders who came- oh god that makes me sound old. You know what? Screw it. You wanna eat chocolate while I drink wine? Thattagirl.